So I walked around all day today, wearing jeans with a sports bra/tank top thing and gym shorts underneath. And I sagged. It looked like I was wearing boxers. I felt pretty damn hot. But I felt even more baller.
I'm telling you. It's the little things in life that make you happiest.
So seeing as I am Heat, I'm probably supposed to be all intense and smoldering and seductive and sexy, right? WRONG. I am the world's biggest klutz. Well, maybe second to Swift. But I'm up there. Prime example: Three nights ago, while suffering the most cataclysmic attack of PMS known to womankind, I yelled at my boyfriend because he told me to stop speaking in a high voice. *It should also be added here that he came from across campus at 11:00 at night to come see me. I am the epitome of gratitude.* Obviously, he pointed out the aforementioned fact and made me feel incredibly guilty, the result being that I howled my apologies at him and wrestled my fat self off the couch to go hug him. I ended up tripping over his bookbag and falling on him, crushing him and, I believe, his family jewels in the process.
Sad day.
My feet also seem to have quite a penchant for my mouth, because they're ALWAYS in there. I say and do the most retarded things. Like today, for example, when I was talking to Swift on the phone and she was trying to tell me a story, and she told Vikram to shut up. Without thinking, I said, "Yeah Vikram, shut up!" The aforementioned Vikram is Swift's brother. Which I realized right after those words had shot so sweetly and kindly out of my mouth. Swift, tell your brother I'm sorry and that I love him and his Wolverine and wussup wussup antics.
But this may possibly be the most embarrassing moment of all. While walking to the dining hall today, I noticed these Indian guys playing football. Which is quite rare, you know. I rarely ever see Indian guys play football without making complete fools of themselves. So naturally, I stopped to watch. The guy who was throwing the ball told his friend to move back further so he could throw the ball. The friend said he could never throw it. So I, the silent yet extremely engrossed audience, waited to see what would happen.
The guy threw the ball all the way. It was actually pretty damn impressive. And without realizing that all these guys could see perfectly well what I was doing, I raised my eyebrows and my jaw dropped a little.
Next thing you know, one of the guys is yelling out, "Oh damn! She's impressed!" As if they need any more fire to stoke their ego. I'm sitting here at this point, completely embarrassed and walking away, and to top it all off, the guy throwing the ball goes, "Hey I'm doing it again! You should come watch!" And my bitingly witty retort?
"Nah, I'm good."
~*Heat*~
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