I'm not hungry.

I don't know if I'm alone in this boat- but I like to eat even though I'm not hungry. I don't know why- I just enjoy food so so much. There's nothing I love more than dipping pita bread into hummus and tasting its amazingess as it slides down my throat. If I've had a spicy meal...I HAVE to balance it with something sweet. Hershey Kisses anyone? Look at me right now, as I'm typing this up I'm munching on some indian fried snack my mom gave me. I had lunch like 3 hours ago- THATS IT. Why food? why must you be so good? oo I'm starting to rhyme..


Why food?
Why must you be so good?
Why must you be so pleasing?
Why must the smell of you be so teasing?
When I lay sight on you, a feeling stirs deep inside me,
A deep rumble, grumble- I just cannot let it be!
As I give in, I also begin to fight,
NO LIQUID DONT EAT THAT YOUR JEANS'LL GET TOO TIGHT!
Alas, that last morsel takes its place in my tummy,
smiling with an evil grin..WHY MUST YOU BE SO YUMMY!!
It's all over now- I've consumed the equivalent of 2 pounds,
and the cycle starts again, I keep going in rounds.

Liquid :(

Of fires, fish tanks and commando Indian girls.

So this is a tale of epic proportions.  In order to distract myself from the bio test that is looming over the horizon and stealing my sleep, sanity and stress-relieving ability, I'm going to tell you guys about last week.  Because last week was hilarious.

The only important thing I had due last week was a chem lab, so I decided to start on it early.  I was in a particularly bad mood that day, and trust me- when I am in a bad mood, you do NOT want to mess with me unless you have some kind of death wish.  So I was walking around with this awful glower on my face and punching the keys on my keyboard as if each of them had done me some kind of great injustice, when Liquid ran in with white stuff all over her shoulder.  In mingled disgust, curiosity and amusement, I asked if it was what I thought it was.  No, it wasn't.  What WAS it, then?  It was expired peanut butter, Vicks and Aveeno.  Which Liquid then proceeded to smear all over my forehead.

The next fifteen minutes were happily passed screaming and chasing each other down the hallway and getting peanut butter-Vicks-Aveeno on every available surface of each other.  In the end, it ended up in our hair, on the door, you name it.  Disgusting, but SO worth it.

And to clean up afterwards, we took a group shower and belted out Disney songs.  Needless to say, I returned to my room feeling much better.

:)

~*Heat*~

Mr. Lonely

Yes today was the snow day. Seems like everyone had fun. I didn't. It was possibly THE worst days I've had in a long time. And I mean a long time. It started off miserable so I never really had any hope, but I didn't really expect it to get worse, did I?
So first of all, I usually don't have class on fridays. This friday I did. damn. what a shitty start. Then. I got up and worked for a few hours and dragged myself to class. By the time i got out it was snowing and an inch had already accumulated on the ground. Good? Bad. I had forgotten my scarf so all the snowflakes were going down my shirt. It was freezing. Not to mention snow pounding down on my loose hair, which was the smacked fervently thanks to the vicious wind, meant that I had wet hair slapping me as I walked all the way back from the management building back to my room. Of course there would be no buses. It sucked. 
Once in my room, I started cleaning. yes, cleaning. I cleaned for 2 hours until my dad came and picked me up. Throughout those two hours, I listened to people shrieking with joy as they made snow angels and had snowball fights right outside my room. I could see them outside my window, but I couldn't just go join them.


I was alone. Have you ever felt so alone that you hate everyone for not being alone? that was me. All my friends had either gone home or were ignoring my calls because they were "doing cs." So I really had no one to enjoy this winter wonderland with. I just watched enviously. The one hour i spent with my dad in his car today was possibly the best one hour of this whole day. He's a close friend of mine and he enjoys listening to me blabber on and on. And since he just let me blabber, I enjoyed it too. We got home and I saw the garage open and our lawn untouched and I was sure that my brother had just been waiting for me to come home so we could ruin our yard's perfect blanket of snow. 

i was wrong.


He was at a friend's house and didn't return until well after dark. Well after the snow had stopped falling. I was alone. and I didn't get to play in the snow.

As if my day could not get ANY worse, I got into a huge argument with my mom. This argument has been a long time coming but basically I hate her. I don't really hate her. I love her a lot. But I was obnoxious to her and in return she was obnoxious to me and the only reason I was obnoxious was because she had been really irritating and apparently she was only irritating because we were having communication issues. but the point is. I hate her. I don't really hate her. I love her a lot. 


Well anyhow, i don't think i've sobbed this much in a while. but it's just one of those days. I tried to call the boyfriend to talk...he usually makes it better. He was busy though--



making a snowman.




As I lie in bed, the only thing i can say is thank God that day is over. It sucked.


##Dirt##

Chamatkar.

Not like the chamatkar from 3 Idiots.  Legit chamatkar.  Today has been such an amazing, beautiful, downright magical day.  Today has been one of those days when you wake up in the morning and you don't quite feel on the same level as everyone else.  While everyone else drudges around on earth, you feel so much higher, so much more exhilarated, and for once in your life, you don't see everything that's wrong with the world.  Instead, you see the world as a magical place, as if you're just entering it.  And the possibilities are endless.  Once I was clearheaded enough to function, that's how I felt this morning.  There's something truly beautiful about waking up to the rays of the infant sun streaming into your window, filtered through tree leaves.  It makes you feel so alive, like anything is possible, and like the world is your playground.  

And it only got better after that.

About a half hour before my econ exam, it started to snow.  When I finally got out of class, the scene in front of me was picturesque.  The trees and ground were enrobed and blanketed in white, and the snowfall looked like it was suspended in time, because of how slowly the flakes floated to the ground.  It was a lazy, powdered-sugar-on-French-Toast-snowfall that was enchanting to behold.

That, of course, was all before I had to walk back to my dorm through said snow.  Catching a snowflake or two on your tongue is very charming, but when they're all pouring into your mouth, that's something quite different.  Either way, though, there's no denying it was nice =)

After I got home, I had a snowball fight with my brother (in which he got his ass thoroughly handed to him), which was awesome because we COULD actually make snowballs.  I've never seen this much snow in one yard before.  We ran all over the yard and ruined the pristine-ness of the snow with footprints and ridiculous attempts as snow angels, but still.  It looks like something out of a Norman Rockwell Christmas card.

And now, I'm about to go to sleep, but I still have an awesome view of my backyard through the window.  And all I can say is that there's something truly enchanting about gazing out the window and seeing white pine trees flecked with green, snow-covered rooftops that look almost like gingerbread houses, a sliver of moon peeking out and cutting across the night sky, and the orange glow of streetlight on freshly fallen snow on the grass.

Sweet dreams :)

~*Heat*~

dear blogosphere, what is a HOMO?
i don't know. i typed it into google and got a lot of weird answers. 


right now me and heat are in the lounge falling asleep working on our chem labs. and life sucks. truly. 




except for i keep remembering the awesome things that have happened. like, that guy keeps talking to me (i love you mister mister by the way. really truly i love having stupid crushes on random people :D) my mom came to visit me today, i had an AWESOME weekend, i don't have to wake up till late tomorrow (which might not make a diff depending on what time i sleep tonight....) and the fact we're going to the aquarium tomorrow. do you know what that means??? 




JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH
JELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISHJELLYFISH. 

<3


SWIFT

GUESS WHAT'S COMING UP?!?!?!?!?!

I have an econ exam on Friday and a killer chem lab due tomorrow.  BUT.  You wanna know the redeeming factor?  

On Thursday...

We are going...

To...

The AQUARIUM!!!!!!! :)  And we get to see the jellyfish and the sharks and the fishies and the otters ALL FOR EIGHT DOLLARS.  Cheap cheap CHEAPPP.  AND AWESOME.

Time to work on the lab.

~*Heat*~

So I'm dating an Eagle Scout, chick magnet frat...shark?

I know I promised myself I wouldn't put nauseatingly adorable posts on here about my boyfriend, but I decided he deserves this one.  So here we go.

The basics: He's 6'2".  He's brown.  Dark brown eyes.  He's got a large nose (which, incidentally, is fun to fence with).  He's got hair that creeps into his eyes and looks awful when he's just woken up.

And he's one of the cutest, funniest, sweetest guys I've met.

The not-so-basics (there's a lot more of these):

He's an avid gamer.  Maybe avid's not a strong enough word.  Passionate.  Obsessive.  Something along those lines.  He's economical- our first date was at Taco Bell :)  And I don't think he really understands the word no or the concept of giving up, because as far as I've seen, when he really wants something, he GETS it.  Whether we're talking about his black belt, his membership in a frat, finally becoming an Eagle Scout, or even me.

He's the strong, silent type, to an extent.  It isn't easy to get him to talk sometimes, but once you DO get him talking (whether it's about Mass Effect or Kanye West), he doesn't shut up.  At the same time, he's got a deadpan sense of humor that never fails to make me laugh, even when I'm EXTREMELY pissed off.  (Granted, this is when he tries to physically rearrange my face into a smile.  Which kind of hurts sometimes.  But still.  It's funny.)  And if you're being hypocritical or unjust, he'll tell you that that's what you're doing, regardless of who you are.

He has his quirks.  He thinks he's super mysterious (which he's not.)  He enjoys touching the feet of people who are younger than him (even though he's NOT SUPPOSED TO).  He's not very into sports.  I know that when he watches the Superbowl tonight, he won't know what the hell is going on. ***EDIT.  I WAS WRONG.  he apparently DID know what was going on.*** He does, however, seem to like noses.  His own nose always seems to pick up spicy smells even if the smell he's SUPPOSED to be picking up is sweet or fruity.  After taking four years of Spanish, he still doesn't know that cojones is the Spanish word for balls.  He thinks he's a shark, because he's misunderstood.  He enjoys feeding people and is a devout believer in the healing power of food.  He does fruity pushups (Any pushup in which you don't go down all the way and push yourself back up is not a legit pushup.  Sorry.)  He's generous with his chewing gum.  He steals knives from Woody's.  And most importantly, he's extremely proud of his lovely complexion.  

Overall, let's face it- he's a crazy guy.  But he's as strong, generous, compassionate and determined as they come.  And he's just as sentimental as I am, if not more.  He knows how to have a good time and joke around, as friends, but at the same time, he knows how to be...more than that.  He gives hugs that make you never want to leave him.  He treats me like a guy and a girl at the same time.  And he's extremely close to understanding the gigantic fiery ball of crazy that is me.  And this is why he's damn near everything I wanted or needed. 

He's not too bad on the eyes either.

~*Heat*~

Isn't She Lovely?

So there I was Saturday night, on my couch, eating a brownie..watching the Miss America pageant. oh lordy lord did I regret that brownie I ate after watching the swimsuit competition. I put on my Miss. Alpharetta High School crown, plopped down on the couch and enjoyed me some good quality TV. Fifty girls under 130 pounds, over 5'6" with extremely toned bodies strutting their bodies on stage. Me? Awkward 5'7" with a weight of...130..ehm. This is a really short post- but i just wanted to put my feelings about beauty and pageantry out there.

I have a personal liking towards make up, shopping, clothes and pageantry. I see all these woman scoffing at beautiful woman who just like to take care of themselves and look good. I'm sorry if its a misdemeanor to want to feel good on both the outside and inside. I don't think acting like a "girly girl" constitutes as being a disgrace to the institution of feminism. In fact, I think encouraging both outer and inner beauty can strengthen feminism as a cause. Why not make cosmetics and fashion an aspect of feminism? Building feminism through these cosmetic channels. Why not portray make up and fashion as part of the "strong" and "independent" image- rather than put it down and have it as an opposing force towards the institution? Feminism, in my opinion, is about strength and courage. These woman, these beauty queens, have both. It takes a lot to stay so in shape. It takes a lot to walk around in stilettos all day long and smile even though it hurts. It takes a lot to make yourself look beautiful on the outside without messing up the inside. It takes a lot to stand up against people who judge you by your beautiful outside- immediately assuming that you're lacking in brains. Trust me, I know this very well.

So to all you "feminists" out there who think its necessary to be a complete boy in order to be a "strong woman"..you can just suck on them. Because honestly, I'm gonna strut my stuff in pink, get my nails done, wear my coach purse, stilletos, and dress- and still save the world. I can play some bball, rap, eat a lot of food, lift weights, watch action movies and listen to weird music- but I'mma still be a girl. Beautiful on the outside..and on the inside :)

I can breathe again.

I have been swamped in stuff to do this entire week.  And I just knocked out my bio reading.  So I finally- FINALLY- have some time to myself.

I'm not feeling particularly inspired at the moment.  Nothing interested has really happened.  The weather has been abysmal.  And I am ALWAYS hungry.  I might go on an adventure this weekend, provided the weather cooperates.  I've always wanted to hop on a Green bus and just go somewhere off campus.  All of downtown in my grasp, and I've never reached out to explore it.  I'll see if I can do it this weekend.  Hopefully it works out.  I promise I'll have deets if it happens.

~*Heat*~

Field 401

Everybody's comin I got the place so packed

Kevin's got food and the shoes all stacked

You could call it the full house

That's right Bob Saggot

Dr. Phil ain't comin

We don't invite prinbaggots

(drusef)

vanakkam

i was walking on clouds one day

waiting for epiphanies to come way

when a train of thought

just came and shot

my dreamless world to pieces.






so this was my legit poem. when I asked these people what to write about next,  they hurriedly, without thinking, gave them this list

the first things to come to heat's mind are sex and god. i'm not the type to bang and tell so here's a very wholesome poem about god.






God


vanakkam, vanakkum, vanakkum
anyone that doesn't believe in you can suck on em (heat's contribution)
you're a badass modafuffer, the opposite of gluten stuffer, you silence my noisy muffler
you're too cool for school, i drool when  you jump in a pool because of your body.




no irreverence intended please God don't smite me with your lightnings.










feb 3, 2010 12:43 am




so im in field 401 after studying like a million hours. i still think im going to fail. whatevs, i got my cookie monster hat and my thor shirt and my backup dream job of making a fast food indian restaurant and the assurance that I'm going to be a jellyfish in my next life. so life is livable i guess.